tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post825325372619200531..comments2009-10-27T06:44:59.008-05:00SOLOMONSYDELLEhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17564768670896215900noreply@blogger.comBlogger32125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-45603296448027620852009-10-27T06:44:59.008-05:002009-10-27T06:44:59.008-05:00try talk to him in a gentle and calm manner..be urslf.....and do wat u can do best......shadehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00065332141628486377noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-48174486036479992222009-10-25T10:20:00.879-05:002009-10-25T10:20:00.879-05:00Talk to him and tell him how much this Charles fella bothers you. Ask him if he would be comfortable if your girlfriends gave you love advice that makes him miserable.lucidlilithhttp://lucidlilith.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-10422348332284507492009-10-25T06:19:09.045-05:002009-10-25T06:19:09.045-05:00I agree with everyone else who has said you need to talk to your husband about it. <br /><br />I&#39;ll only add that when you do, don&#39;t do it in an accusatory manner e.g &#39;how dare you talk about our sex life(as waffarian mentioned, clarify if indeed he has/does) with charles&#39;!<br /><br />Rather, let him know how it makes you feel e.g. &#39;The thought of you discussing our sex life with Charles makes me feel X,Y, Z&#39;.<br /><br />From the post, the emotions i&#39;m getting are - anger, embarrasment, frustration amongst others (i may be wrong). However, i&#39;m assuming your husband loves and cares about you and if you make it clear that his actions are causing you discomfort,then that should be sufficient to make him reconsider (UndaCovaSistahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05443026441324744879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-32652886119627738832009-10-25T00:49:30.275-05:002009-10-25T00:49:30.275-05:00Talk to hubby. Then let him know how revolted you feel that he dicusees your bedroom business with Charles. It makes you uncomfortable and the thought that it was suggetsed by Charles makes it more difficult to swallow for you.<br /><br />Ask hubby if it is right to be discussing your private life with an outsider? That is what Charles is,and would he like it if you did the same with your girlfriends? He is your husband and Charles should butt out!LusciousRonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14448225682004908627noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-49618153632393685832009-10-24T11:02:48.431-05:002009-10-24T11:02:48.431-05:00hey marriage isn&#39;t gonna be easy at all. what is this? no idea what she should do, i hope she finds a way to sort it out, maybe follow one of these adviceHYAWhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04410209040818503094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-74812701665728751672009-10-24T07:50:49.074-05:002009-10-24T07:50:49.074-05:00She needs to talk to her husband and if her hubby wants to try something new in the bedroom, they have to discuss it first.SEPTEMBERhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15221629896741930249noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-6902742978936862982009-10-24T00:00:52.979-05:002009-10-24T00:00:52.979-05:00I think she needs to speak to her husband cos he&#39;s obviously comparing his BFF&#39;&#39;s sexual life to his when infact they aren&#39;t in the same situation. She&#39;s his wife, Charles has his done by &quot;various girls of his&quot;.Tatababehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09599954307515336096noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-71942582841409929622009-10-23T21:31:30.497-05:002009-10-23T21:31:30.497-05:00I&#39;m with waffarian! <br />nowhere in d post do i get d sense that your hubby discussed your sex life with charles, instead it is obvious they discussed charles&#39; sex life. This does not take away from d fact that charles might be a jerk. however i think it&#39;ll be wise to talk to your husband about keeping your sex life private. <br />I dont think its wise to deny your husband sexual pleasure except it something extra extra kinky like anal sex, lol!bumighthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16921134538404613210noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-77487998715610033292009-10-23T19:36:32.033-05:002009-10-23T19:36:32.033-05:00This situation is not bad as it seems if you can get yourself a lil closer to the BFF, and talk your way out with your husband.<br /><br />I also feel sincerely that your man needs some spankin(smiles)..what sense of security and love is he providing to you and your marriage if his bff can get him to ask you to do somethin i feel should be private to your home?TRYBEShttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18256053296221593013noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-53774201948506331232009-10-23T19:14:55.953-05:002009-10-23T19:14:55.953-05:00Right I second waffy oh if na extra kinky stuff like choking... mmm abeg no die oh. <br /><br />@SSD may I suggest that people who submit questions about their issues tell us how they come to a resolution later on? just cause i&#39;m curious (you know i&#39;m not the only one) and it might be helpful to readers. that is if they feel up to it of course.Mogajihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06922049364473945647noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-90209190228926725662009-10-23T19:10:02.681-05:002009-10-23T19:10:02.681-05:00Yeah what everybody said except you have to find something that is at least as wild if not wilder. Try hanging from the ceiling :-p. <br />Men have their egos tied to sex and competition. right now your man is feeling less like an alpha male because Charles is getting something that he isn&#39;t. So you have to give him something to be smug about. <br />Then talk to him later on about charles and let your man see that Charles is not the standard your sex life should be be compared to because Charle&#39;s just wants another notch under his belt meanwhile your marriage is about MAKING LOVE.<br /><br />P.S. If you ever feel like it I would suggest that you try what Charles suggested down the line cause chances are your man will never forget about it.Mogajihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06922049364473945647noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-85351075262337080402009-10-23T19:05:47.915-05:002009-10-23T19:05:47.915-05:00Am I the only one that wants to know what the &quot;thing&quot; is? I can&#39;t give advice until I know the details...<br /><br />cos if na small thing, like dick sucking, licking, etc, then no be wahala whether e come from Charlie or dickenson...<br /><br />But if na extra extra kinky stuff, then ehen, na to either discuss matter or get nasty drunk...<br /><br />But first, wetin be the &quot;thing&quot;?Waffarianhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06039619178621668954noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-61267769079804828862009-10-23T18:14:50.022-05:002009-10-23T18:14:50.022-05:00sorry but this is funny...thats how some guys make mistake and chop slap...if its something new in the bedroom...he(the husband) should have alteast talked to her about it during their freaky bed talk and he shoulda let her know then that there is something he wants to try...rather would love to try and see how she feels about it and not just spring it up on her like that...she should talk about it with her husband...and maybe could find a solution to charles and prolly try out wateva her hubby wants..Dreamerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01950685298353875975noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-89175378787287831812009-10-23T15:44:51.842-05:002009-10-23T15:44:51.842-05:00I really don&#39;t think its right for her husband to be discussing his bedroom affairs with charles. I think he should be mature about it and set boundaries.<br /> If Charles doesn&#39;t like marrigae, that&#39;s fine! but he shouldn&#39;t come and put sand in another persons garri.Ms. 'dufahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08500315507490299815noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-50828916803386218422009-10-23T13:21:58.277-05:002009-10-23T13:21:58.277-05:00Wow this is truly hard, Charles sounds like a jackass sha. His Treasure made a good point and I also see Myne Whitman&#39;s other POV as well.<br />Hmmmm...Original Mgbekehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11409561613382179987noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-81845882082213793162009-10-23T12:45:35.195-05:002009-10-23T12:45:35.195-05:00Sorry but I think I&#39;m on the husband&#39;s and BFF&#39;s side here. From the write-up I don&#39;t think Hubby discussed their affairs with BFF. Instead he discussed BFF&#39;s sexlife with our lady here. <br /><br />My dear, if your hubby has a sexual fantasy and you want to refuse him and start a week long quarrel just because he got the idea from his BFF who you don&#39;t like, you&#39;re only doing yourself. I suggest you set yourself free and give your hubby what he wants in the bedroom now and always. In fact I will add that you should draw Charles closer and I bet you your hubby will love you the more for it. All the best.Myne Whitmanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07595087387069634003noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-7144820816982539652009-10-23T12:42:42.657-05:002009-10-23T12:42:42.657-05:00Wow.... this is serious, but i just couldn&#39;t help giggling at the end of the post. She has to have a rational discussion with her husband. God will help her.Stinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15375583469985472050noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-17071706989254157322009-10-23T11:44:13.736-05:002009-10-23T11:44:13.736-05:00Get Charles beaten up by some street urchins!!!<br />Okay I kid...<br />I guess it&#39;ll help to talk to your husband...<br />Gosh that&#39;s a good girl&#39;s response but seriously I still feel the charles of this world should be beaten up!NoLimithttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03879937849991946112noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-29422428284184383612009-10-23T09:28:55.108-05:002009-10-23T09:28:55.108-05:00talk to hubby and set boundaries and as crazy as it may seem talk to charles bout these boundaries<br /><br /><br />pray also o!Renehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00393782396724702703noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-89499514448266861852009-10-23T09:04:20.378-05:002009-10-23T09:04:20.378-05:00What sirus said, what adaeze said, what histreasure said and then you back it up with serious prayer - a lil more than im sure u r doing, fasting and prayer is the solution to this problem .....pray that God strengthens your husband mind and pray that God sees and end to the friendship or turns things around in the friendship....goodluckneefemihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00770543533340729142noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-71748844876023020412009-10-23T08:59:51.983-05:002009-10-23T08:59:51.983-05:00i would definitely take &#39;his treasure&#39;s advice.leggyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09376870655077211326noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-80068512899494986462009-10-23T08:42:06.825-05:002009-10-23T08:42:06.825-05:00shuu see gist o!<br />I wont say talk to hubby cuz i am only imagining that u already have...I mean that should be the first thing u shuld have done once u started getting uncomfortable.<br /><br />Now you sound like you know God, so tke it to him in serious prayer, cuz there is never a good ending with a bad companion.<br />As we know, it is easier to make a good person bad than the other way round, so please tell ur hubby to be careful....Bad companions are TERRIBLE, trust me I kno<br /><br />And prayyyyyyyyyyy!<br />Fast...<br />etc, ask God to come down on this matter and change what needs to be change in ur marriage/hubby&#39;s friendship.Geehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06909364343809991921noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-4151554975224709302009-10-23T08:22:18.337-05:002009-10-23T08:22:18.337-05:00I don&#39;t think its feasible to stop your husband from talking to his friends, particularly Charlie about sex. The best thing would be to have a conversation with your husband that should involve commitment from both of you to solve this issue. Hope this works out right for youSweetnothin'http://www.blogger.com/profile/07201367008326060865noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-45563488355705319862009-10-23T07:47:11.048-05:002009-10-23T07:47:11.048-05:00I cant begin to say I understand how this woman must feel. But I share her fear about my partner being too close to his friends to the point that he discusses all our affairs with them.<br /><br />I personally dont think her husband is dealing with the situation well. I cant help but feel that he is weak and perhaps inattentive to the needs of his wife if his friend can be causing her so much discomfort.<br /><br />Having said that though there is little she can do to stop her husband being friends with this Charles and in fact I&#39;d recommend she doesnt even start. What I am however worried about is how she&#39;s letting her resentment towards Charles affect the sexual activities within her marriage. If she&#39;s not happy to practice something sexually with her husband it should be entirely for valid reasons such as safety etc rather than being because of Charles. <br /><br />My advice is that she should make her husband her business and try as much to ignore Charles. She should also speak to her husband about how she feels and implore him never to discuss her with Charles and for them not to discuss Charles either. The problem may seem huge now but I am certain that Charles will soon find a distraction and leave them alone.Parakeethttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14034748785098588120noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1344503392644402073.post-80267299877810632452009-10-23T06:16:38.842-05:002009-10-23T06:16:38.842-05:00I&#39;ve never had this kind of experience but Sirius has said my mind to a large extent. <br />A deep, honest conversation is imperative.Vexing and quarreling is only going to make him listen to Charles more. <br />Do not be overtly antagonistic towards Charles esp in your husband&#39;s presence as this will put him on the defensive.<br /><br />instead work on your strengths, contrive ways to edge him out,little by little,snippets of his evils in hubby&#39;s ears,never more than a sentence or two and never in argument.(cos truth be told, there&#39;s no way to stop them from discussing sex if they&#39;re stil BFF<br /><br />And then work on your husband - in bed.blow his mind and then talk about this thing he wants, tel him u r hurt that he never discussed it with you, tell him u r not afraid to try out new things with him but that the idea of Charles knowing both ur biz is not right.<br /><br />that you would rather u guys discover things together, read about them and try them out without Charles checking to see if he has had it done on him.histreasurehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05925905506788362848noreply@blogger.com