Yes, I am coming to you good people for some assistance on a situation that is driving me nuts.
Many of you are friends of mine on Facebook. We chat sometimes and send each other silly pictures, videos or even stories. That is fine. However, something happened to me on Tuesday that almost made me jump through my computer and whup somebody's behind on Facebook!
Let me give you some context, sha. In November 2008, I created a Facebook group called FREE NIGERIAN BLOGGER, JONATHAN ELENDU. The objective was to raise awareness about the arrest of Nigerian bloggers by the SSS and encourage others to do what they can to support our constitutional freedoms. Anyway, I recently sent the group an update message, informing them that another previously arrested blogger, Emmanuel Emeka Asiwe, had finally left Nigeria and was in England.
The following is a communication that ensued between myself and one of the group's members who I will refer to as 'Individual'. Please be aware that everything you see below is 'as is' - no editing or anything - its all straight from my Facebook 'inbox'.
Individual: was very happy when i heard this news.
SolomonSydelle: It is good news indeed. Hope all is well with you and yours.
Clearly it was a mistake for me to be polite, because he then sent me this crap...
Individual: yeah im very kool over here, just dat i can wait to be in ur arms. make sure u dont do wat i wont do. luv yah always! [sic]
????????????????????????????????
WHAT IN THE G-SHOCK HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
Please, excuse my language, but the steams drifting from my head are enough to grill suya.
Firstly, I do not know this character. He isn't even a 'friend' of mine on FB. Na wetin be dis?
Secondly, at what point did he get the impression that he is supposed to be 'familiar' with me? What rubbish!
This is exactly why I have always had a problem with FB and believe that facebook is the devil! People overstepping their limits. I believe in respecting people, and have learned never to abuse boundaries. This cat has clearly been "sipping on the kool aid" as my homegirl says. I was simply going to send him a one sentence response saying, "Um, excuse me?" but something tells me that the Easier Crew will have a much better solution for me.
So, my people, what am I supposed to do with this character, because something most definitely has to be done. I don't think I will even be able to keep still and not 'G-check' this fella before I get some good suggestions, but as a mother of plenty pikins, I have learned patience and will definitely employ it.
Now you all understand why I stay anonymous and don't even have a 'real' FB page. Imagine someone I don't know, some person in a group I am a member of, sending me lewd and crude messages? God help me! And now, even Facebook's creators and administrators are beginning to show themselves by asserting that they can use your name, image and pictures for whatever they choose.
The devil is a liar!!!!
Lord, please give me strength.
Anyway, fire away...
59 Easier Comments. Add Yours!:
first...not been in a long time...yay!
FB! I wld av gone anonymous if nt for my friends...lol @ cant wait to be in ur arms, dts how they pt someone in trouble. Nonsense.
2nd and third...Kewl! ok, i think i need to stop! too hyper!
HH 2ND!!!! WOOHOO!!! it shall be well with me this Week. Umm I think you should just ignore him, but then again I tend to stay away from drama.Ill let the other good people decide his punishment..:)
I think you need to make sure he is talking to the right person, maybe he is assuming you are someone he knows. If he mistook you for someone else then I am sure he will be remorseful.
But if he is trying to ...in ur arms ke...hmmm...it is very best you set the boundaries early and clearly in a diplomatic way - not hurting his feelings but passing on the message.
na wa oooo
i don't know
maybe he doesn't know who he is talking to
i think that is it
so as Rita said verify that he knows u and all that wonderful jazz
but if u dont have a real facebook page how will he know he knows u
mercy this is getting complicated
okay so final advice
find out what you can make sure u know he knows he doesn't know u and then take it from there
oh one more thing
breathe in
breathe out
and be nice to my nieces and nephews ooo tell them the candy i sent is under the fridge
Block and delete!!!
what the hell does he mean by he can't wait to be in your arms? ara oko!! hiss.. there's no point wasting your time my dear, just block and delete him!
You are anonymous on FB?!
How?????
Anyways, I joined, caught up with a few old friend, drama hit on issues of the heart, got bored and eventually I left.....
I haven't missed it for one second!
I don't think you should be worried, just tell the guy off, and put him in his place.
Facebook is my nightmare come true....
It's all hype something I am doing without and coping well
First off, I must inform u in case u don't know, if someone who is not your friend sends you a message on facebook and you reply, u've immediately granted that person access to ur profile for about a month as if they were a friend.
With that been said, since u have already corresponded with this person at least once, in which case he can see ur profile, I wud suggest you respond in a stern manner...tell this guy that you are offended by his remarks, tell him you do not know him for him to do that and even if u did, his remarks were rather disrespectful. You might want to also mention that u r considering that the message was meant for someone else and sent to you by mistake, but that if it wasn't a mistake and it persists, u wud be forced to report him to facebook for sexual harassment, block him and even ban him from your group.
ciao
...H20
Lol…my dear SSD there are too many random people on fb that feel they now have a right to walk into peoples lives and behave like idiots…
it is not just facebook…blogging itself has brought such mumus to my door….i just ignore them or reply saying what do you mean by this?!!!
His familiarity could just be that he feels he knows u thru your posts but I doubt it because ‘…i can wait to be in ur arms’ is just a stupid thing to have said… then to say ‘make sure u dont do wat i wont do. luv yah always’ shows he still thinks with the mind of a unruly & devious child…mscheeeeeewwww…oloshi
Seriously I think the guy will probably read this post and send you an apology…
I would send him a reply with the link to this post…so that he can see that it is not acceptable…he needs to know you are not overreacting…even by reading comments he’ll see that it is not normal to address u or talk 2 you like he has.
This reminds of a random dude that saw my pic & kept messaging me and insisting that I accept his fb friend request…after a week I agreed… the next e-mail he started calling me babe…I wasted no time in removing him…another arab dude has added me as his friend 2ice…1st time I declined and change my fb profile pic to a less seductive one…2nd time I declined and changed my privacy setting so only my friends can see my profile pic …I did check out his profile to see that all his friends were exotic looking fine babes…each to his own but his own is not my portion!!!
lol @ fb is evil…sista solly it is the people with their devilish intent that make it so!
p.s
Might be worth keeping your tone very very formal (almost business like) with respect to the Free J Elendu group messages. I would also recommend that any replies to people’s responses to your updates are in the same tone... so no more ‘so hope all is well with you and yours’…I know you mean well but some people need much less of an excuse to misbehave!!!
i laughed soo hard when i read this matter.
guess what?i dont think he meantt o send it to u?infact i am almost positive he didint mean to send it to u so i support ur initla response been "excuse me?"
or "pardon me"
Imagine that been sent to a lady in a relationship that had trust issues and the guy saw it.
dat FB na devil true true.lol
have a nice weekend
Don't understand what the freaking out is for. I get strange messages like that all the time. I thought everyone gets them too. LOL. Just ignore and delete and/or block. No need to give him a piece of your mind. Is it worth it? U'll be writing to some virtual personality who mighta been drunk @ the time he sent that thing (or he mighta sent it to the wrong person).
Abegiiiii!!! Dat one na small matter.
Edit your privacy settings. So that even if people are on your group they can't possibly even see your profile.
There's no reason to freak out. Before I learnt how to tweak my privacy settings, someone emailed me about how God had showed me to him in his dreams.
I would have said you should email him a piece of ur mind but when you email your facebook strangers, they can see your profile for like 30 days. You don't need that.
Some people are just HHEEEEDIOTS.
SSD, that's just the whole story of facebook... these random people have caused all sorts of problems for innocent people because they like to talk trash...
if someone stumbled on your convo with this person telling you they cant wait to be in your arms it would be so hard to explain that u dont even know the loser...
all i can say is ignore ignore ignore! and watch what you put on facebook. i dunno how people put pics of their kids and weddings and honeymoon on facebook, there are so many weirdos out there... and now facebook itself has promised to put our pictures wherever it desires. aint no telling these days men, one day we will log on blacknastybutts.com and see cute pics of us... *shakes head*
lmao....no wonder you were so cheesed off that day...
He might have been confused about who sent the mail...or he might just be a fool who sends forwarded mail without reading it...you know the type..
I think you should just ignore him thats what I do and believe me I used to get loads of foolish emails before I removed my email add from my page.
Dont give him time, just ignore him...
First, like some people have already mentioned..change your privacy settings. Then send the guy a no nonsense message telling him to back off. Some people don't know what personal space is and just act all randy not knowing the consequences of their actions.
Please don't get too offended...ignore him and delete him if he carries on any further.
Facebook...always causing drama!!
Have a nice weekend xxx
FB would have been a really lovely thing, at least it helps u get in touch with so many people that u, ur lost friends as far back as primary school.
but as it is, its become a nightmare.
i recieve all those stupid messages all the time, but i hardly feel bad cos i dont do FB often, cant remember the last time i checked in.
i did something stupid, i left my fone number (very stupid).
one stupid idiot was calling me last year and saying all sorts of obscene and annoying things, they are not even printable. and the idiot made it a habit to always call me midnight or early mornings!
he hides his number of cos.
he stopped when one day he mistakenly called with his ID on and i sent the following text:
"you will be a failure in life, u will never make destiny, u will live to hear bad news all ur life, u will live a disease filled life and ur purposeless life will be cut short".
before u yell at me, the things he said were too obscene, u cant imagine how horrible. i dont feel bad.
back to the question:
tell the idiot off! which mistake? tell him off now now! and block him or woreva it is they do. just send a frigging stinker and block the idiot or the next time, he will say things that will ruin ur day!
for some reason, i have never just gravitated towards facebook o...at all....i just use my a.c for the basics.otan.
When I moved to Naija for NYSC, facebook was a dream because I kept in touch with friends and family for free! It has gotten silly so I have locked down my privacy settings so I am no longer visible to people who aren't my friends already.
Mrs Solly don't stress, just BLOCK & DELETE. End off! All this ask him this, tell him that. No point at all!
Don't worry about FB if they go ahead with the pictures ownership, they know plenty people will take then to court which is why they have halted all plans. The back lash they are getting is unprecedented :)
Laffing my head off...just delete the yeye dude from the group(I hope that is possible...FB can be funny atimes)...don't bother wasting your energy on him o...there surely point in doing that...me thinks...ignore,ignore and ignore some more!!!
I say, Ignore him.
SSD,
What can I say. Its not only pretty ladies that get these messages you know. I have and deleted immediately.
With everything created, there will always be the other side to it. Even the bible is being quoted to aid bad deeds.
FB has its advantages and disadvantages. I have an account and as a result of my blog, quite a few readers have requested to be friends. Hey, there are millions out there who only dream to be in your position - to bring laughter and information and campaign for a good cause.
As with everything in life, you need to know how to be in control. There are facilities on FB to empower you to do just that.
I have chosen to use an old photograph and I do not have any family photographs. I have had countless requests to do otherwise. That puts me in control.
At first, I was using real family names in my blog entries. Now I don't. That is my prerogative.
SSD, I know you will not throw away the bath with the dirty bath water, would you? Not unless the bath is no longer serving your purpose.
Chill SSD.
Delete the guy and move on.
Sent with all sincerity.
Oh Oh!!
Dear don't get yourself worked up at all.. It is not worth it seriously
Facebook can be a major source of drama...I rarely go on and when I do I make sure I appear offline lol...
The guy must definitely be confused. If not then you must be a real MUMU! You know what? Don't even bother yourself with such nonsense. This guy and his likes are NOT worth it! Like you said, use the patience you have learned as a mother of plenty pikins. Stay cool my sista!
Sometimes it seems there are weirdos everywhere we turn -eh?
One question for you though, if Facebook is the devil, what does that make everyone on it?
i can imagine how angry u are....... since its not ur real identity, my advice is to let it go.... ignore him, fools like him r def not worth ur time....
enuff good advice
delete him
do ignore him-he aiint worth ya tyme
SSD, don't be surprised by this. Lots of people use fb and other social sites for hook ups and stuff. The impersonal nature of the site means there is almost no downside to it. If the target responds they could get a hook up, if not they just move on without losing face. I think FB is even better than Hi5. I mean, my friends and i used to be inundated on Hi5 by creepy messages from random men especially Naija guys.
Best thing is to block or ignore the guy after you've given him a stern warning. Or even better, like a nigerian woman i know does to scammers, you can give him a bible filled message ala..Jesus loves you etc. It's amazing how fast unsolicited friends disapear when you start preaching to them.
Delete and ignore!!!!
And all m saying its not just FB...I'm starting to wonder what my blog says about me too because...nway never mind...sis delete and ignore abeg!!!
Just ignore it, and it really isn't only fb, I think the world has gone mad or perhaps it has always been and we didn't notice.
BtW facebook has always had priacy issues. we just don't take the time to read the terms and conditions.My lecturer hated the whole thing and didnt understand why we all had pages.
I'd say ignore him! Some folks are not worth spending time worrying about...
Or maybe it wasn't meant for you!
Erm.. Just block the silly guy jare... Not worth killing yourself over.. Finally deleted my real FB profile this week... The whole drama thingy was getting too much....
ignore i believe it mite ve been a mistake but if not A VERY STERN warning. pele dear.
ignore i believe it mite ve been a mistake but if not A VERY STERN warning. pele dear.
It is a good thing you are anonymous on fb (and by anonymous, I hope you mean you have NO personal info that can be traced back to you). Like Shubby doo mentioned, I think you should send him a stern reply and attach a link to this page so that he can see that you are not the only one reacting negatively to this.
People have turned f/b, blogger, myspace, the whole internet into a bootycall pickup. It's about time people learn that the fact that you are not communicating face to face does not give them leeway to be explicitly familiar.
The beauty about Facebook is that you can block, delete and edit privacy settings. People online always overstep boundaries, they don't really understand the value of a virtual interaction. Stress not over this though...I'm sure our suggestions will put you at ease!
lol, shebi u asked him "how are u and urs?" lmao
really, i dont get it when people say facebook is evil. Fb has become the new hi5.
Every single person on my facebook is a friend. mostly school friends. I dont add random people, and if i cant verify how i know u, u not getting on my fb. period! which is why i have like 50 fb friend requests.
Also, when u are a "public e-personality", aka, blog celeb like urself (lol) people feel like they know u. so he's prolly a reader of ur blog.
im sorry, i still find this funny! lmao!!
you just reminded me sef, i have to send one of those messages to Wande Coal on fb, lmao!!!
Dude probably doesn't have boundaries or maybe he just lacks common sense. If u r really offended, u can tell him you don't appreciate such over familiarity. If not, just ignore him/block him.
LMAO. For some reason, I find the dude's response hilarious.
I would just ignore the dude really. Pervert!
Thats FB for u...
Do you know how many pple I have blocked and deleted?
SSD.. just block the guy and delete him..Don't let this kain thing bother u joh.Cheers
I really dont believe he meant to send the msg to someone else, but if u wanna give him the benefit of the doubt, u can ask what u wanted to ask him and if he carries on, block his ass!
ignore the ode joh
lmao. Aunty SS, please ignore him and no vex o jare. I guess its different for married peeps, but me, I fo just grin and ignore it.
lmao...dnt mind all those stupid jobless men that think facebook is hi5 hiss..
just totally ignore
silence is the best answer for a FOOL
lol.That was really weird under the circumstance.
Surely this sort of fb 'interface' is also becoming mainstream. It is archetypal to those experienced by celebrities or famous ladies whereby fans or some naughty gentlemen create or use opportunities to feel horny with them.
Unfortunately, facebook becomes the more vulnerable between any other forum since proximity and access to beautiful and famous people is overtly enhanced.
Maybe u should take him as one more individual out there who is bereft of civility. Hush him to forbear henceforth.
I am sure this is a mistake. He does not sound spooky from your previous comms with him, so I reckon he may have hit the send button at the wrong time and to the wrong address.
Best thing would be to send a message:
"Are you talking to me? Heh? Are you talking to me punk?"
and see what he does.
hmmm.......... please beware the FB'S face. Just filter what you receive, candid advice.
Regards
Ignore!!bone...!!!fashi...!!! No need splitting hairs over such issues,except you want 'them' to look and feel like winners.Got our heads full with better things than to be bothered about comments from deranged fellows.
Omo Oba, na waaaaa ohhh.
* * *
Mii komment has bin safed, hand will be fiisible after di owner appruvaal.
Awww hell nah! See Madam SS, me I no fit ignore things sha. Man pikin musto tok their own and I would really have to check his ass on some 'Excuse me, but feeling familiar much? Where and where do you know me from that you feel you have the right to send me such a lewd message? I would advise you to respect yourself before I put you in check' and then proceed to block his foolish ass. Nonsense and ingredient!
thats why i call that place faceCRAPbook. im on there but i cant wait for the day i'll get the inspiration to close my account, which is soon by the way.
as per mr individual, break him a piece of ur solid mind, u dont owe him anything to be polite after that.
how are the pikins?
Solo, individual is just being silly. Thats the kind of familiarity/insult we face/experience on the net. Just ignore him 4ever.
I like that you have put up a personal issue on TTEC.
Lol! You should see what someone is doing to me here on blogger! Its an internet thing Solomon. The distance makes people indulge their cowardice, rudeness etc etc
Frankly I think facebook sucks.
just ignore him, people are that annoying..really!!! and facebook I agree is a real breach of privacy
hehehehehehehehehehe Chei Jehova, buhahahahahahhaahhaaha. I don die! Sorry to laugh, but this is simply hilarious. It's not their fault, it's facebook's fault biko, just block them and keep it moving like some people said. Some people are just he-goats in human form.
Haa! The facebook conspiracy is getting way out of hand and everybody is begining to see underneath the surface just as I wrote about on my site!!
Thanks for letting it out jare. People need to be aware.
Post a Comment