EYES IN THE BACK OF MY HEAD

Do you remember being a kid and somehow your mom could always tell what you were doing, no matter where she was in the house? I remember being younger and the minute I was about to do something even remotely naughty, my mother would shout "Eh, move away from there," or "What are you doing?" How did she ever know what I was about to do? The mystery puzzled me for decades.

But, not any longer.

I have become that mother that can instinctively tell when her children are up to no good.

You can call it 6th sense. My girlfriend recently joked that I was a "winchy winchy" but I am telling you, my ability to 'catch" these children is "hella good!"

Case in point, yesterday, TK and Bomboy were in the playroom doing what they usually do - destroy toys, fight each other and then somehow kiss and make up. Anyway, I left them to go check on a pot of chicken stew. As I turned the pot, I noticed the usual sounds from the playroom but then all of a sudden, things became very quiet. I crooked my neck so my ears could pick up some sound, but nothing, nada, zip!!!!

I put my cooking spoon down, and tip toed over to the top of the stairs to listen better. I could hear them, but they were trying to move like stealth soldiers, and I knew something was up. I didn't even bother to go downstairs, I just shouted,

"wo, tim ba mu e bai!!!" ( "If I catch you...")

Mehhhnnnn, you won't believe what happened next. With serious and exact speed and alacrity those boys just scattered! I heard their father's putter (which I have hidden a thousand and one times) fall to the ground. That had to be Bomboy, because everyone elese knows that the putter is off limits. I also heard a small body jump out of the computer chair. That had to be TK because he fancies himself a typist of some sort.

I returned to my stew. Added a few more ingredients and came downstairs. The evidence of a crime confirmed my detective inclinations. The putter was lying on the floor and Bomboy had put himself as far away from it, as possible. The computer screen showed an advert that I would never have clicked on and unfortunately, my computer developed a nice little virus that I spent the entire Monday trying to get out of the computer's system (hence the delayed post).

Now, if only I could simply read their minds far before they do anything naughty. That would be an incredible skill, right? Actually, I'm not so sure. Sometimes, the things Bomboy says in gibberish sound like straight up insults. I don't think I would like the translated version which is what I would get if  could read his mind. I will just be thankful for the eyes at the back of my head skills. Thats all I need for now. lol!

By the way, I saw Uncle Tobenna's wedding site and would just like to say, him and his wifey are simply the CUTEST COUPLE!!!! My girlfriend knows a friend of his and that babe sabi put 2 and 2 together, sha. I cannot lie! Sorry, I will not divulge Uncle Tobenna's secrets,  but if you would like to know his website's address, please wire $2 million to my Carribean bank account. Em, no, I'm not taking dollars, let's make that pounds. For wiring instructions and additional information about my off shore account, shoot me an email so we may complete the transaction. hahahahaha.

Aunty Verastical!!!! Here are the drawers!!!! lol! For those that don't know, Vera did a post about boyshorts, that compelled me to go buy a few. Well, a little more than a few. I like boyshorts and bought a few more this weekend. Anyway, here is a pic of my boyshorts and matching top which was my Independence day outfit, of sorts. Enjoy!!!!

See you guys on Friday. It won't be a TTTEC installment however. After dealing with the last issue, I feel a little depleted and so, I will provide an Image From My Life. I figure we could all do with some laughter, so this friday, swing by to see a funny picture from my life. By the way, Wunmi has not yet decided whether she will go through with an abortion. But, after chatting with her on Saturday, she is definitely taking a little more time to consider her options. I'll keep you updated once she gives me permission to do so.

God bless!!!


Ah, I just remembered what I was supposed to blog about. It is sooo funny. These children embarassed me again oh!!!! Well, we'll save it for Monday's post. =)