Wednesday, November 28, 2007

BOMBOY...

It seems like it was only yesterday when Bomboy was born but believe it or not, the bobo is now crawling and becoming a full-time young man! He confidently plays with his siblings and bounces on their heads for entertainment. The child demands attention from his father and I by crawling up to us and pulling our pants! He also enjoys crawling behind TE when she is riding her bike around the house! She, in turn, enjoys being chased around by her incredibly active baby brother.

There is something that makes me apprehensive, however. It appears that the boy already adores his big brother, TK. That in itself is not a problem. Nevertheless, the two of them huddle in corners together, probably organizing their strategy to 'show me pepper' (drive me nuts). Yes, yes, you think I am over-reacting, but if you lived with TK, the possibility of having two mischievous monkeys would be enough to make you worry!

Bomboy emulates TK! At my neighbor's house, the boy crawled all over the place, yucked it up with my neighbor's mother-in-law and of course, (as is becoming regular) got into a little trouble. He crawled up to a plug-in air freshener.
http://feedroom.speedera.net/static.feedroom.com/t_assets/20060810/606c8eae5b4c4d9189e1690ceee578488ebbdbea.jpg
As the boy lifted his hand to touch it, I said (in my 'Don't be naughty' voice), "Bomboy, don't you dare touch that air freshener!"

The child looked at me, with beautiful, wide eyes, dropped his hand and appeared to be remorseful.

Everyone (a bunch of Nigerian folks trying to cook for Thanksgiving night) started clapping for him and then they congratulated me on how disciplined all my children are including Bomboy who is only 7 months. Me too, like mumu (an idiot), I began to feel accomplished and my head began to swell. I turned over to Bomboy and said, in my most reassuring voice, "Good boy, I am glad that you are beginning to listen to us when we talk to you. You are such a good..."

Before I could finish the sentence, I saw my son's face change. One second, he looked like an innocent little baby, that had realized that he should indeed heed his mother's caution. Next moment, the boy's face took on some seriously 'naughty' characteristics. A little voice in the back of my head wondered, "Why does that look so familiar?" and "Where have I seen that look before?"

My people, that boy looked like the most mischievous little child you have ever seen! The corners of his mouth curled up in naughty glee and the boy grabbed hold of the air freshener!!!!

I shouted in shock! I could not believe that my baby had so deliberately and deceptively disobeyed me! He suckered me into believing that he would cooperate only to do what he was warned not to do! If that is a typical TK move for you, then I don't know what is!

Anyway, it wasn't until the following day that I realized where I had seen that mischievous look before. I was sprawled out on the sofa eating some scrumptious but sinful macademia nut cookies when TK ran past me. In his wake were drops of water. I shook my head in exasperation because I knew my quiet time was abruptly over and stood up to see where the water was coming from. I couldn't quite tell so I simply followed the boy. He was in the kitchen pouring water from his sippy cup into his sister's big-girl cup and then pouring the water all over his body. In shock, I sucked in my breath. He heard me, stopped with the cup right above his head, ready to pour and smiled. People, the smile he gave me was the exact same grin that Bomboy had flashed on his face the day before!

So, you see, I am right to worry about Bomboy. It appears I have another TK in training and Lord knows, I am not sure I will be able to handle it! God help me!

lol!

Monday, November 26, 2007

I'VE BEEN TAGGED - 8 WEIRD THINGS ABOUT MOI

Princessa tagged me to write 8 weird things about myself.

I promised I would complete this meme so, here we go. Oh, by the way, the numbers are in Japanese. Top that! lol! (Before you ask, I studied Japanese, so no, I did not go online to get the numbers. My foreign language skills are just tight like that!).

Ichi. I can't stand people that stare. People seem to stare at me a lot and I have fortunately learnt how to deal with it without losing it but I think it is the rudest thing. I swear I could never be a celebrity because I would be on the cover of magazines slapping people all the time or pulling a Britney...

Ni. Although I have been very skilled at doling out nicknames to people, I have never had a nickname. Well, there was "Mimi" just because someone couldn't pronounce my name when I was an infant and oh, yeah, Husband calls me "Wifey". I guess I'm just not cool enough to get a funky nickname! What does that say about me? Uh oh...

San. I always wanted to be a 'Chief Home Executive Officer' (CHEO), aka housewife.Well not always. It happened when I went to law school. I realized from seeing so many alcoholic classmates, law associates and partners that the best thing I could possibly do for my children is take some time out to raise them properly. I have faith that once the time comes, I will be able to either go back to the legal field in some capacity or do something else that is even more exciting. (God please, na beg ah dey take beg you oh.)

Yon. I have horrible long term memory. It is extremely embarrassing, really. I cannot even remember most of the people I went to primary school with. Thank God that my close friends know and cover for me when necessary. Hahaha. I have been in quite a few situations where my failed memory got me in trouble. Quite a few, actually. Wait a second, is that weird or not?

Go. My second toe is longer than my big toe!!! It is cute though, lol!

Roku. I am obsessive compulsive about food. If I start thinking about food, I won't rest until I gobble it! It drives my hubby nuts, but he's a good sport about it though. I even start to dance when I eat good food and it doesn't matter whether I am at home or at a 5-star restaurant. In fact, I had some moin-moin recently that made me dance all over the place!

Nana. What else is weird about me? Oh. Well, back to dancing, I love dancing in stores. You know how they play music that is supposed to induce you to spend all your money? Well, me, I start dancing down the aisle especially when they play some good funky stuff! So, next time you are at Marshall's, Macy's, or Nordstrom's and you see some cute lady getting her groove on by the sales rack...that's me! lol!

Hatchi. Last one - I do not like memes! They are way too hard for me! lol! I don't like thinking about my self and I don't like sharing about myself so there will not be too many more memes in my immediate future. Thank you Princesa for challenging me to do this, but, ol girl, I tire! =)

So, enjoy this funny song about a child wanting to drink stout. Don't bother listening to the whole thing, just the interaction between the child and adult. Priceless!!! It reminds me of TE who at around 2 years old would always ask me for wine or rum (her father's beverage of choice). In fact, I must share the story of how that girl actually drank red wine once...




Come back on Wednesday for a new post about TE, TK and Bomboy. Cheers!

Friday, November 23, 2007

30 days of Thanksgiving - Day 23 - THANKFUL

I was tagged by Writefreak and Allied to participate in the 30 days of Thanksgiving Meme. I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving Day and if you do not celebrate the day, I hope you had a wonderful Thursday. Next post will be on Monday!

Here we go -

God has been so good to me and the people around me. He has smashed down doors that were jammed shut. He has shown me wonders I never expected and has gently guided myself and others towards blessings.

God has surrounded me with family and friends that love me and that I can trust. Good people are incredibly hard to find, but by his grace, I have had the good fortune to meet many of them. For this and so many other things, I am eternally grateful.

I thank God for his kindness upon this world. Even in the midst of suffering and pain, we can always find evidence of his grace and love for us all.

Lord, I thank you for the incredible sweethearts you have given to Husband and I. As is the case for all parents, it is our greatest honor to raise them by your teachings and encourage them to blossom into incredible human beings. May you guide us in this task, for it will be the greatest testament to your glory.

Thank you for everyone who reads this Lord. Regardless of their faith or temperament, may they be blessed abundantly so they too will be thankful!

And of course, thank you for allowing TK to 'reveal' where he stored the contents of my wallet! Words cannot express my immense gratitude.

Thank you Lord!

Monday, November 19, 2007

AN OPEN LETTER TO GOD ALMIGHTY

Jesu Kristi, Baba mi:

Thank you Father for the kindness you have shown me. Thank you Lord for your patience and immense blessings upon my family.

Dear Lord, please give me the strength to figure out where TK put the contents of my wallet!!!!!!! I have imagined the world as a naughty 2 year old boy and I cannot find my Driver's License. I have crawled around in the living room and I still cannot find my credit cards! I have searched kitchen cabinets and under seat cushions and all I found are a couple of pennies, some candy and a long lost semi-precious hairpin which the boy clearly hid many months ago!

Olodumare, you are the beginning and you are the end. You know all things and are all things. You alone can divine where the child put my bank cards. I am sorry that I left him alone for a few minutes. I understand that he felt slighted and that is why he rummaged through my handbag, emptied out my wallet and used my expensive MAC lip gloss on his booster seat. (Next time, I will buy the cheaper Wet N Wild version so he can use it to make 'art' with abandon). I want to officially blame Catwalq! I was reading an extremely long post at her blog and in fact am yet to comment due to all this wahala.

Oh Lord, you are the Alpha and Omega. And so, I say this prayer to you and have faith that my life will return to 'normal' sooner rather than later!


Your humble daughter,
SolomonSydelle

UPDATE: Husband miraculously found my cards over 48 hours later. How? Apparently, TK had hidden my cards under the fridge! While watching the Golf Channel, Husband noticed TK playing with a credit card. Being the detective he is, he followed the young man back to the source. And, voila, there was the boy on all fours retrieving his stolen booty from underneath my fridge! Make una thank my Husband for me, oh! Now, I can go get my hair done.

Friday, November 16, 2007

PROTECTING OUR CHILDREN

This post is a departure from the usual light, happy content on this blog. Unfortunately, I would like to share a serious issue with you all and hope that you will humor me by reading this short post in its entirety, thinking about the message and hopefully, doing what you can to help others.

It recently came to my direct attention that there are individuals that seek children and hurt them. By hurt them I mean raping and sodomizing children as young as a few months old! I heard a horrible story a few days ago and I have been unable to sleep ever since. (Sorry, I have not been giving permission to share this story. But, I can assure you that you do not want to know the details).

The thought of anyone harming one of my beautiful babies is enough to drive me into a serious frenzy whereby I would harm and possibly maim another human being. So, you can understand that I am truly upset and desperate to find a way to prevent such abuse from reoccuring. I know that I cannot stop ALL abuse, but I hope that by raising the topic, we can be on the look out for people who perpetrate such madness and that we can all be bold enough to take decisive action to stop violaters before they commit such crimes and/or ensure that they get the punishment they deserve.

It is unconscionable and absolutely abhorrent that there are men and women who derive pleasure in robbing children of their innocence. My people, if you KNOW of any person that is a child pedophile, PLEASE contact authorities and report them. You can do so anonymously. We have to find a way to protect children from such filth. Children are innocent and do not deserve to experience the wickedness of evil people.

If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, please contact your authorities or an organization that can assist in getting the assaulter off the streets. We must not turn a blind eye to such madness. If you need help in protecting yourself or others, please contact me and I will do my best to get you the help you need.

I appreciate your time, my ...EASIER... fam for reading this post. I assure you that all is well with myself and the family. I just had to take this opportunity to reach out to all of you on this issue. If this post can protect even one child or adult from sexual assault, then a departure from stories about my naughty kids is well worth it. Don't you think so?

Nonetheless, I have a new post coming up on Monday, so you will not have to wait long.

Thanks! God bless!

Monday, November 12, 2007

LAUNDRY

I spent Monday morning doing laundry and listening to my collection of "Abidjan Music" (TE's term for all African music) on Youtube. While I folded clothes, TE danced and TK ran around destroying toys (as usual).

I decided to put some more clothes in the washing machine and so, I added some detergent. While doing this, I instructed TK to take a bowl from which he had eaten upstairs to the kitchen sink. "Okay, Mama." is what he said. I then became distracted by Bomboy who needed some attention. So, off I went to take care of my son and when I returned, I simply closed the washing machine, pressed the appropriate buttons and went on with my business of one thing or the other.

Once the cycle ended, I went to put the clothes in the dryer and what did I discover? My lovely son, The King, had wasted no time in adding his things to the wash. They included -
  1. A plastic hanger
  2. An orange golf ball
  3. A small red fire truck
  4. A yellow plastic bowl (which included a sparkling clean bone!)
Okay, na wa! Apparently, when I went to take care of Bomboy, TK took it upon himself to assist me with the laundry process. But, honestly, did I ask him to help me do laundry? And if, I wanted help, would those be the things I would have included? I mean, a chicken bone in the machine! The boy just looked at me with a grin as I pulled his things from the machine. When I pulled out the bowl and bone, both he and his sister began to chuckle. I asked the child, with my serious voice,

"TK, why did you put the these in the machine and not in the sink?"

"I don't know." He said.

"TK, we do not put these things in the washing machine. We only put clothes in the machine. Do you hear me?"

"Alright."

"Don't do that again, okay?"

"No!"

"What do you mean, "No"?"

"No!"

"Why, No", TK?"

"'Cause I said so..."

That was all I could take and I burst out laughing! Who puts bones in washing machines? Only my son with the collusion of his sister, who didn't bother to warn me of his naughtiness! Hahaha! But, mehn, that chicken bone got washed clean! I've never seen a chicken bone that clean. Okay, not true, when my mom deals with a chicken bone...well, there is nothing left by the time she is done. lol!

Happy Monday!

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

HE IS SUCH A BOY....

Na wa oh! TK is destroying my house! The boy is hardly 2 but because he has grown women like Catwalq and Princesa jockeying for his undying attention, he thinks that he can do whatever he wants!

He just had his birthday party this past Saturday and I think he thinks he is special. lol! He enjoyed his fete but really loved the presents he got from friends and aunties and uncles. He now keeps saying "Parry" (can't pronounce party properly with only 8 teeth, you know!). BTW, Jola Naibi, your daughter's clothes are clean and her goody bag is ready, oh. (Long story, for another day...).

But back to the issue at hand. My son is such a boy. In the last week, he has ripped up books, broken toys and disobeyed us on countless occasions. He has also chosen to "mark his territory". See me see trouble, oh! The boy took off his diaper, ran around the play room and pee peed all over the place. I mean, he was strategic! He pee peed in one spot, then held his pee and moved to pee in another part of the room. Over and over, until he was done! I stared in disbelief and began to chide him for his brutish behavior. But, my Husband? Well, that was just a sight! The man was laughing along with his son. It almost seemed as if he was proud to see his son spray his pee all over the place!

As I type right now, the boy is in front of the fire place swinging his little penis and looking at his reflection in front of the glass! What am I going to do with this boy? And, did I mention that Bomboy seems to look up to the bobo (boy) already? Now that he crawls, he follows his big brother everywhere and they huddle in corners, laughing and being naughty together. Thank God I have my daughter, TE, who keeps an eye on them and reports them speedily when they get into trouble. Please pray for me that I be able to keep up with TK. If i don't...I will be in big trouble! No lie!

Let me try and put a diaper on that man and his silly member! He is still admiring himself. Silly boy!

"Hey, you, come back here...."

Monday, November 5, 2007

WANT TO LOSE WEIGHT? ELEPHANT MAN CAN HELP YOU...

I discovered this while talking with Billie Paige the other day. I watched a few minutes and couldn't stop laughing. I tried to watch it again and TE and I were laughing so hard that she farted!

Anyway, if you are trying to lose weight, or develop muscle tone, why don't you consider Elephant Man's Dancehall workout video! If you don't watch it to burn calories, or learn dance steps, you can at least watch it to laugh as hard as I did!



Did you feel the burn??? Watch that fat melt off your body, baby! Couldn't he get a couple back up dancers! I'm sorry, I meant gym rats!

Hahahahaha!!!!!

Next post comes your way on Wednesday. There are tales to tell from TK's birthday party on Saturday! Thanks to the warm and wonderful Jola Naibi for being a part of the festivities! Also, guess who I met on Thursday? The incredible, the invincible - Catwalq. Aunty Catwalq, we are preparing to get the 15 cows, oh. Or was it 30 that your people requested? Yes, oh. TK is in the process of 'carrying wine' for Catwalq oh!!!!! What is a mother to do but organize things. I am a modern woman, so I understand that mature women now hook up with younger men, but really Catwalq, will you not leave my innocent son alone? Haba!!! He only has 8 teeth, he doesn't have a job and he lives at home with his mom!

lol!!