Monday, April 30, 2007


So, I came down to the living room on Monday morning. No kids in sight.
"Where is TE?" I asked Husband.

"She's downstairs watching cartoons," he replied.

A few minutes later, I asked, "Baby, which cartoon is your daughter watching?"

You will not believe the words that came out of that man's mouth. I replay it in my head, in slow motion with the typical suspenseful music they use in the movies.


I screamed and ran downstairs to rescue my child from those horrible creatures. But, I think the damage had been done. By the time I got to her, Angelina Ballerina was on.

I went back upstairs and gave it to Husband. "Didn't I tell you about that evil program? The kids can't watch that nonsense." I yelled. He had food in his mouth, laughed and gave me the "wtf" look. I then told him about the nasty video I had seen. I discussed this video in a post already and am quite sure I showed it to him. The man simply laughed and told me didn't remember.

My poor daughter, I just hope she won't be scarred!

Thursday, April 26, 2007


I was watching the democratic candidates have a debate on MSNBC today and heard a piece of news that saddened me. According to Barack Obama, black infant mortality rates are going up in America. Mind you, when he said this, I was feeding my newborn son.

Assuming that Obama was not exagerating, it is sad to hear such news. America is supposed to be the biggest and the baddest and infant mortality seems to be an issue that is easily tackled if the proper socio-economic factors are addressed. So, why is this problem worsening?

I had my baby in my arms (he was nursing), and could only feel pain and disappointment. I could hear Husband and the kids fooling around in the play room and thankfully, that brought a smile to my face. I realized that I must be thankful for the health of my family as even in America, babies are unable to survive the challenges of life.

So, wherever you are, I implore you to take a moment to be thankful for what you have, no matter how small. As the song goes, 'count your blessings, name them one by one, and it will surprise you what the Lord has done....'


Tuesday, April 24, 2007


TK did it again. Scared the living daylights out of me. This time, it wasn't a booby he was after, thank God!

I was lying down on the sofa dozing with Baby #3 on my chest. TK and TE were upstairs, supposedly napping when all of a sudden, I heard a loud "THUD" and the entire house shook!!!! I swear, I thought the house was about to fall apart.

I practically flung Baby #3 on the sofa and ran up the stairs to TK's room from which the sound had come. I opened the door and what did I see? My son had jumped out of his crib and was crying!!!! I picked him up frantically, searched his body for any bumps or cuts. Thankfully there were none. I kissed him and tried to get him to calm down. Can you believe that once I put him down, this child stopped crying, crawled down the stairs and went off to play? No tears, no pain, no nothing? Just me, with my heart in my mouth and my body shaking from fear!

These children, I swear. They put the fear of God in you sometimes. The boy just wanted to get out of his bed and the only reason he was still crying when I got to his room was because he could not open his door! I have learnt my lesson (again) - these children are incredibly resilient. And, now, he sleeps on the floor!!! There is no way in hell, I will give him another opportunity to pretend to be Superman and jump out of that crib again. Next stop? Walmart. We are buying that child a big boy bed, so the next time he falls, my house won't shake and the foundation will remain intact!

Saturday, April 21, 2007


TK and I had a mother and son moment. I took him out for a drive to pick up a few things. One of the things we got was deodorant at my local dollar store. Unfortunately, it was not the exact same one I last purchased. They had run out. So, I am stuck with a 'shower fresh' scent. Not my favorite, and it doesn't even go on clear, so I have to watch out for the white marks. Nonetheless, it is definitely an improvement over Husband's. I was tired of smelling 'manly'.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007


Today was arguably one of the scariest days of my life. School never scared me like this. Work never scared me like this. Having 3 kids never scared me like this.

What scared the living daylights out of me was the look in TK's eyes when he saw me whip out a booby to feed Baby #3! The boy even licked his lips, like he was about to breast feed or something. He tried to climb up on the sofa with Baby #3 and I. I screamed for Husband, who, thankfully, showed up in no time to rescue me. Did I ever mention that TK has teeth? I shudder at the thought....

Tuesday, April 17, 2007


Why, oh why, is my deodorant missing? When I came back from the hospital, it was in my toiletry bag. While relaxing in front of the tv on my first day home, I recall seeing The King running all over the place with it. Then, The Enforcer took it from him and there was a small battle for possession.

It has been over a week now and my deodorant is now AWOL! Who would want to deprive me of my deodorant? Unfortunately, I am now forced to use Husband's. Not too bad, except for the fact that my deodorant smelt like baby powder. Such a comforting scent. Husband's deodorant, on the other hand? Well, it just smells strong and manly, not my style. I like my deodorant to smell soft, sweet and to be relaxing. I prefer that it not overburden my senses each time I lift my arms. I miss my deodorant!!! I bought it at the dollar store and it means so much to me.

Deodorant!! Please come back to me!

Sunday, April 15, 2007


... over 'please' and 'thank you'?

The King is in quite a state these days. Husband decided to enforce proper manners and TK ain't havin' it!!!!

Daddy insists that TK say 'please' and 'thank you', which TE does all the time. TK instead, grunts at you.

Well, in response to his daddy's pressure, my son is now on the defensive and mad as hell. He screams in protest, cries until he's red in the face and produces massive amounts of snot in his nose. It would be funny except for the fact he's like this all the time. In the morning, in the afternoon and at night.

The only thing that placates my little monster is an offering - a food offering! On Saturday, he cried for a good 40 minutes. He only stopped crying when he saw his daddy produce a roti filled with goat meat and rice. Boy, did he get happy. All the disagreements about saying 'please' and 'thank you' disappeared. My son was quick to grunt his please and thank you. Where was that cooperation before? Why did we have to deal with the commotion until the roti emerged? Not fair! Did I need to have a headache? I guess so. This is what we all go through when it is time to teach children manners. It was just so much easier with his older sister.


Saturday, April 14, 2007


Disclaimer: If you would rather not read about boobies, lactation and the stress of it all, PLEASE SKIP THIS POST! Thanks.

There are various stages to the creation of life. We all know how the sperm gets to the egg, blah, blah, blah. Then, comes 9 months of pregnancy, constipation, morning/all-day sickness, cravings, etc. Then, you deliver the baby, experience less sleep and in my case, the hardest stage of all comes next - bloody breastfeeding.

This is my third child and with each child, I have had a hard time breastfeeding. The Enforcer breastfed for approximately 7 months. Initially, it was painful and extremely stressful, but we soon got the hang of it. And, then, one day, I gave her a booby, and she calmly pushed it away and crawled off. I was shocked and upset, but soon came to see the beauty in her gesture - NO MORE BREASTFEEDING. HURRAY!

The King wasn't so lucky, though. I produced so much milk that the nurses at the hospital joked that I had enough milk to feed all the babies in the nursery. That joke did nothing, however, to make the breastfeeding process easier. In fact, the result was the opposite. Anyway, I had to have dental surgery not too long after his delivery and the need to take antibiotics made it easy for me to decide that I had to stop breastfeeding. He made do with the many gallons of milk I pumped and stored in the fridge. He was all of 3 months when I stopped breastfeeding.

With Bomboy, I was determined to get this damn act of breastfeeding right. Somehow, I am unable to achieve this feat. My left booby seems to work just fine. It's a little tender, but I figure it will get better with time. Booby #2 hurts like hell!!!! I can't not have Bomboy use that breast because I do not want my booby to get too full - could cause problems and maybe even a trip to the hospital. I have resisted bringing out my breast pump out of a silly sense of bravado, after all, women without breast pumps manage to feed their babies. But as of today, I give up! I am tired of having my poor son cry because I am hesitant and he is hungry. I am also tired of having severe back aches. Finally, I no longer want to shed tears of pain because the beautiful act of feeding my child is torture.

So, tonight, I will bring out my trusty Ameda Breast Pump (thank God we made the investment 3 years ago). I will pump the hell out of Booby #2, which should open up most of the ducts, make the nipple tougher and possibly make breastfeeding easier. No more pain, no more stress. Breastfeeders of the world unite!!! Uh, just kidding. Sorry for the rant! But if you have problems breastfeeding, my advise is this - hang in there, it gets better and you are definitely not the only one in your situation.

Thursday, April 12, 2007


The whole family was relaxing this morning watching cricket. Husband changed Bomboy's diaper and handed it to his sister to place in the trash.

Upon reaching the kitchen, she realized that her dad had removed the trash bag from the bin and set it on the floor. She thus asked, "Should I put the diaper in the bag, Husband?"

We just looked at each other and laughed. What does one say when your child constantly refers to you by your first name?


Tuesday, April 10, 2007


Yay!!! I gave birth to a 7.1lb young man with a full head of hair and a sweet disposition. As I type, he is resting in my arms, relaxed and calm.

We thank God for this absolute blessing! He is healthy and actually quite funny already. Upon arrival, he promptly peed on the nurse charged to weigh him. He then peed on the first nurse he met in the nursery. He makes us think it is safe to change his diaper and once you open his old diaper, what do you get? More pee all up in your face!

TE is ecstatic and has fallen into her role as big sister with great enthusiasm. She gets diapers and wipes, burps him, kisses him and stares at him adoringly. TK isn't as excited yet. He does give kisses though and today, tried to snuggle up to his little bro. I can't wait for Bomboy to get a little bigger so he can fully enjoy his siblings who are thoroughly ready to play with him.

Again, thanks be to God for this blessing!!!!! I'm so glad I am no longer pregnant, though. Now, I can focus on enjoying three kids and start the quest of getting used to finally being a mother of 3.

Wednesday, April 4, 2007


When TE was younger, she would go into the kitchen, grab some pots and pans and play away. She used the pots to cook, the pans as hats and spent a lot of time making music.

Now, TK has come along and followed in his sister's footsteps. Unfortunately, this love of pots and pans has extended to my chopping boards and cooking spoons. It makes for a good laugh except for when you can't find any of your cooking utensils while cooking!!!

That was the case today. I have spent the last 2 days cooking in preparation for D-day (delivery of Baby #3). Of the 4 chopping boards I own, none was where I left them. How am I supposed to chop up onions to cook my stew or my pot of efo (vegetables)? "TK, where are my chopping boards?" I shouted. The boy just looked at me, laughed and scampered off to play.

Next stumbling block - my cooking spoons. I finally found a chopping board (behind the trash can, of all places) and was able to commence cooking. However, I put my ingredients in the pot and started looking for a cooking spoon to stir the pot. Of course, there was no appropriate spoon to be found in the utensil drawer.

Ah, well, I found a spoon (in a cabinet). I only found one spoon, though, which I then had to use over and over again to cook my stew, efo, beans and corn and ogbono soup (I rinsed it each time, of course).

So, now, the family has food to eat while I am in hospital and I have food to eat when I return. No one can say I'm not a good mommy, considering the obstacles I faced in cooking over the last 2 days. Since TK always puts things back in place when he hears his daddy coming (not me, though), I will have to rely on Husband to keep that child away from my cooking stuff!


A gentleman I know, who shall remain nameless, has on many occasions told me that Black people, particularly Black women, have no business working in the service sector. Let me explain, his problem with black women in the service sector was that they were rude and unpleasant. In the past, I always took the time to chide him for his generalization and for feeding into the negative stereotypes against Black women, but now I am beginning to wonder if he was right all along.

After 48 hours of 'recovering' from TE's party, I had loads of purchases to return. As I noted in my last post, the lack of cooperation from the weather meant that most of the decorations I bought were never used. In addition, the fact that I 'overdid' when preparing for the event and bought more party favors than I eventually needed, required that I return unused items and get my money back. (Besides, Husband would have lost his mind if I held onto "useless" luau junk).

So, Husband and the kids take me on a ride to return 'luau junk' to the various stores I purchased from and low and behold I had to deal with a neck shaking, eye-rolling, insolent and rude 'sistah-girl' at the first store I went to. It was just ridiculous. I get to her, smile and inform her that I need to make some returns. The girl is just sulking. I figured she was tired and wanted to go home, so I told myself to be patient. Anyway, during the whole transaction, which took close to 30 minutes, mind you (because she was lazy and slow), 'Ms. Thang' was sour and one would have thought I insulted her or something.

She even claimed that items had been used. I calmly informed how that she was wrong and took the time to explain why. Oh no, I didn't!!!! that only made her madder still! If i had hung up decorations that were clearly meant to marked with tape, would there not be evidence of the tape on them? We are talking about flimsy paper decorations that would have shown use because any attempt to remove the 'evidence of use' (i.e. tape) would have damaged the product.

Anyway, what really reinforced my new belief that 'sistahs' have no business dealing with customers was when I went to the next two stores. I dealt with some nice ladies (yes, not Black) that were polite, friendly, and absolutely helpful in making my returns. This is not the first time I have noticed this difference and am slowly, though hesitantly, beginning to agree that Black people have no business in customer service.

Of course, I know that Ms. Thang is the exception and not the rule, and that it is highly unfair to generalize in such a way. I can name a few ladies at my local supermarket that are extremely pleasant, helpful and Black. It just hurts that everytime I, or anyone I know, complains about service, they just dealt with a Black person. I have got to teach my children to learn how to talk to people properly and how to be professional. Thank God, my mother taught me well. I hope to pass those lessons on to my kids because I'll be damned if they ever act like Ms. Thang!

Monday, April 2, 2007


Phew!!! Thank God, this babe's party has come and gone. Na wa, oh! The stress we parents put ourselves through on behalf of our children. After days of planning, driving around, allowing my blood pressure to rise (because of birthday cake) and losing sleep, the party happened and was an incredible success!!!!

Where do I start?It took several phone calls and quite some begging just to get the cake made. Can you believe that bakers are doing shakara to bake ordinary birthday cake? Anyway, the cake got made and turned out beautiful. See? On Friday, I drove around my community for over 30 minutes in the heat looking for someone to come cut the grass in the backyard. The gentleman I use was also doing shakara for me. Na wa, so so sufferhead just to get simple things done. And, it wasn't like I was looking for a freebie. I guess landscapers, like bakers, are making too much money and don't need none of mine! Anyway, I finally found someone who hooked it up for dirt cheap. God bless him - must call him to say thanks because although he was 3 hours late, he helped me stay under budget.

So, party time, right? Well, this mother spent a whole bunch of money on decorations that I did not use. Why? Because the weather refused to cooperate. Instead of nice, warm weather, we got cloudy, cold weather. Not suitable for a luau. So, we had a nice festive luau-ish birthday party that happened mainly in my kitchen. lol! All the adults were around the kitchen island and the food while the children ran around in circles and had loads of fun.

Each guest arrived to a lei and smiles. The parents soaked up some wine while the kids drank soda. My friend's son, Peter, and Husband permanently parked themselves in front of the popcorn. I swear, the adults ate more of the fish fingers and popcorn chicken than the kids.

Well, TE looked absolutely divalicious in her Hawaiian dress.

She posed like a pro for pictures and kept her sunglasses on for most of the party so as to avoid the glare from all the paparazzi cameras (i.e. her mom!). She also got lots of presents and was quite excited with all the gifts! The one thing that really had us all rolling was when Marley Paige (the doggie whose mom I blogged about in 'Mommy Guilt') took to licking the cake! TE had MP on her lap when time came to blow out her candle and MP took that opportunity to help herself to cake. She got into a little bit of trouble with her mommy, though, but we all had a good time laughing about it. I unfortunately did not catch a picture of MP in the act but I do have a pic of MP in her lei.

Even TK got into the festive mood. He ran all over the place, chased MP around and played with my friend's sons - JC and Peter. Those boys were just the cutest!!! Another friend brought her husband and 3 month old daughter. That little girl was beautiful! And, she already knows how to hand with the girlfriends, I swear. She was gurgling away while we were talking about all kinds of rubbish. She is an official girlfriend, already.

I am extremely happy that TE and her guests had a good time and have definitely learnt a lesson about birthday parties and I guess life in general. You can plan as much as you want, but things will happen according to God's plan, not yours. Although I did not get the outdoor luau extravaganza that I wanted, we were able to have a wonderful party and I am satisfied. Very satisfied. Thanks to everyone for TE's bday wishes. I passed them on, but as you can imagine, she didn't quite get it! I'm sure on some level, though, she appreciated it, being the diva that she is.